Three Things in One Day

Three Things in One DayTHREE THINGS that pissed me off about Los Angeles that I couldn't post while I was there:
1. Traffic & Drivers
Aside from the 80mph bumper-to-bumper at all hours, LA drivers are opportunistic A-Types. In general, I follow common courtesy of using my blinkers to signal a lane change and expect fellow drivers to do the same. Not so in the City of Angels; LA drivers translate using blinkers as, thank you for letting me know there is enough space for me to cut in front of you.

2. Morning News
Watching the local morning news is like watching a comedy sketch. Newscasters are often casually clad (I suppose this makes it easier to sun-worship between commercials), and their remarks are colored with Ebonic-certified street lingo. On top of this, stories of current affairs take on an air of comedy: violent crimes, international politics, etc are delivered without seriousness; it's not uncommon for a newscaster to juxtapose a murder story with stories about the lack of valet parking at the latest restuarants or the sighting of minor celebrities at a Larry Flynt Publications events. I prefer my morning news delivered with CNN-styled uptightness.

3. Random Freeway Shootings
It seems that I am a harbinger of random freeway shootings. While visiting the Home of the Lakers, there were multiple random freeway shootings. It got to the point that I actually didn't want to drive around. This reminds me of the DC-area sniper Muhammad shootings in 2002. Unlike the DC sniper, the LA sniper (or snipers) is still terrorizing the Los Angelians.
I didn't post until now as I didn't want any of the locals to hunt me down. Can you blame me for not posting this while I was in Tinsletown? Not that I'm safer in finger-surprise-chili San Jose, but I just had to wait until I was out of LA to post this.

tags: .....
another point of view ...

Anonymous Calvin

I'm not fond of LA traffic either, and I live here! Looks like you escaped this place in one piece. - Calvin

Blogger mquest

I never watch the network news for news. Occasionally I will flip on the morning news. I must admit I enjoy it. It is the funnest thing on television. (relative to the fact that nothing is funny on television) I find it refreshing that the news people have realized that they stopped doing news long ago and have decided to give up on it and start a morning variety show. Of course I almost never watch it. Oh well

Blogger sojourning crow

yea, i know what you mean about these things man. i saw some porn with too much plot and i got mad and went to go bring it back tot he stor eand soem dfriver cut me off. so i got mad. and he pulled out a gun and shot at me but i quickly got off the exit and i saw it on the news.
pissed me off.

i live on other coast.

Blogger Nam LaMore

calvin: well, LA just wasn't for me. after living up here for so long, my visit down here is just that: i don't think i can ever live down there again.

mquest: i don't have tv at home, so it's a treat when i'm staying somewhere with tv. i know, it's sad that i consider tv a treat; remember when the car sticker to have was: "KILL YOUR TELEVISION" (kill was replaced with SMASH i some places).

yes, i find it amusing that network newscasters are now enlightened that people do not pay attention to them as a news source. i love the no-pretenseness of it all.

sojourning crow: ah, you've managed to combine the passion and the pissed-off all in one comment! well, you need to live in san francisco (or another none-car-heavy city, like new york) where you can walk to the porn video rental store, instead of having to drive there!

Blogger ding

i'm an angeleno in exile and i couldn't be happier. but here are some things i appreciate whenever i go back to visit my family:

1. street parking and cheap valet
2. no one is ever in the museums/theaters
3. movies show there FIRST
4. walking to your car in the parking lot can lead to a tan
5. backyards
6. hearing spanish

Blogger Nam LaMore

ding: you sure are right about the street parking. i've gotten so many parking tickets in san francisco. at one point, it was cheaper just to get a parking ticket than to pay for garage parking!

walking to your car in the parking lot can lead to a tan .. that's so right on. here in SF, need to layer when i'm outside, and then peel inside. but it should be good soon (fog burns off around noon).

speak up!

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